"We must all suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret." - Jim Rohn
Every decision involves trade-offs, this can be a tough realization to accept.
For example, taking the day off from work to go to a concert, choosing something fun includes the tradeoff of losing a day's wages or a vacation day.
When we choose to stay up binge watching Netflix, we trade our sleep time and possibly our alertness, focus, & mood for the next day.
When it comes to our values and goals, compare the pain of progress to the pain of stuckness.
Any time we want to grow or change, we'll be breaking the status quo of living on automatic pilot, following habitual routines, our almost mechanical responses to going through the day.
Shifting out of this almost unconscious state inevitably brings the discomfort of effort, the unfamiliar and the unknown. In some cases, for example when pursuing a healthy lifestyle, there may always be some pain associated with the effort it takes to maintain consistent exercise and the loss of super tasty unhealthy foods.
The good news is you get to decide how important the change or growth you want to make is.
Oftentimes strong emotions are the flip side of something we value.
Asking yourself how you'll feel if you're struggling with the same situation in 3 months, 1 year, or 5 years, is a way to get a sense of the possible feelings of regret you may have if nothing changes.
Each person's ability to make choices and manage their life impacts motivation.
Self-determination theory suggests people are motivated to grow and change based on 3 needs - competency, autonomy, and connection.
The desire for growth drives behavior, feeling effective, competent, fuels motivation as does the feeling one is in control of their behavior and has choices, autonomy. Feeling connected, having a sense of belonging, is also an important source of motivation.
The path of taking consistent steps towards what matters most will not be pain free, there will be trade-offs at every turn, feeling in control of our choices and behavior can help us feel more committed, interested, and satisfied with the process. You decide.